The Critical Order is a site that's an amalgamation of all sorts of reviews. You'll see video games, you'll see movies,comics, theatre, whatever that's new that I am able to see. Regardless, I respect all opinions, so please respect mine. If you have a suggestion for something to review, please post in the comments!
Sunday, July 30, 2017
The Emoji Movie Review
Help.
Hello? Is there anybody in there? Just nod if you can hear me. Is there anyone home?
Come on now, I hear you're feeling down. I can ease your pain and get you on your feet again.
Relax. I need some information first. Just the basic facts. Can you show me where it hurts?
There is no pain, you are receding. A distant ship smoke on the horizon. You are only coming through in waves. Your lips move, but I can't hear what you say. When I was a child, I had a fever. My hands felt like two balloons. Now I've got that feeling once again, I can't explain, you would not understand, this is not how I am.
I have become comfortably numb.
Okay, just a little pin prick, there'll be no more "SCREW THIS DAMN EMOJI MOVIE INTO THE FIERY PITS OF HELL WHERE ITS CYNICAL, CORPORATE, LAZY, OBNOXIOUS, VACUOUS, HORRENDOUS, AND WASTEFUL ASS DESERVES TO BELONG UNTIL THE FOUR HORSEMEN COME TO CONGRATULATE IT FOR USHERING IN THE FALL OF MANKIND!!!!!!!!!!", but you may feel a little sick.
Can you stand up? I do believe it's working! Good. That'll keep you going for the show. Come on it's time to go.
There is no pain, you are receding. A distant ship smoke on the horizon. You are only coming through in waves. Your lips move, but I can't hear what you say. When I was a child, I caught a fleeting glimpse out of the corner of my eye. I turned to look but it was gone, I cannot put my finger on it now, the child is grown, the dream is gone.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become... comfortably numb?
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb.
I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortable numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb. I have become comfortably numb.
I HAVE BECOME COMFORTABLY NUMB.
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